South of the North...

Your probably thinking "huh, south of the north??? What the hell are you talking about?". Well, allow me to explain.

Nascar flags & bumper stickers... check, mullet haircut... check, American/POW-MIA/Rebel flag... check, Budweiser... check, pick-up that is larger than your house (parked on the front lawn)... check, caterpillar hat... check, tatoos... got'em, teeth... optional, motor cycle/dirtbike/4 wheeler..... check... If your on the hunt for anything on this check list, you may think that a trip below the Mason-Dickson Line is in order. Well, you don't have to take the 'ol RV that far.. We have a great little piece of the south, right here in NW Jersey...

Here in Kenvil if you didn't look at the liscence plates on the cars (usually in various states of decomposition & parked on the front lawn) you'd swear that you were in the stereo typical backwater southern town. Let me learn 'yall 'bout whats I means.. See here in Kenvil (like in 'bama or Georgia) if you have an old truck tire or bathtub (actually saw a toilet once), you got yourself a great front lawn plant holder. Old refrig.... that ain't trash, it's great porch furnishings!! Spair TV, put it on your detached deck that's in the middle of your back yard. This way you can share your beer guzzling tv watching escapades with the whole neighborhood!! After all, nothing says "howdy Neighbor!" like a blairing TV set, fire, tiki torches & drunken laughter at 10:00 PM on a Sunday nite! Fireworks!!!! Oh do the hill people love fireworks!! Every night in the summer is like the 4th of July!! They must be very patriotic people! Now here is what I find fascinating about the indigenous peoples of this appalachian region. They may have a perfecty usable driveway, but actually prefer to park their vehicles (bondo on wheels) on their front lawns?? I don't understand why, but it is the most common style of vehicle (working or not) storage. Bushes... Why trim them?? If they grow big enough then they'll cover the house & they won't have to paint it! Why is it that the HP have such a love for animals?? It's like manditory for them to have at least 2 dogs, a few cats & maybe a ferret or some other aromatic creature... Oh & lest we forget the cigarettes... nothing says Kenvil like a guy in a sleeveless pro wrestling shirt smoking a Marlboro & throwing back a Bud can, standing on his porch next to his old fridge, admiring his new extended cab F-350 pickup truck that's parked in his front lawn next to the old rusty F-250 that's near the old tire flower planter and the over grown bushes with christmas lights on them (in july). People... It's something you just have to see to believe!!